-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- @O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O Suburban Terrorism Online Rap and Roll Preservationists @O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O0@O This Issue: The Art of Making Love OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO EDITOR'S NOTE Ever since the issue that was released last April 9th, we have been waiting for the next attack on DMX. Here is the beautiful followup article that B has been working on for nearly a year. -*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+- Why Do Good Girls Like Bad Guys - DMX Overview of Hypocrisy Komrade B -*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+- Why do good girls like bad guys? Hey that's the question all of us computer losers and 3li+3 haXOrs alike ask. I like many other white guys am a closet hip-hop fan. No I don't go about pretending to be black, nor would I consider myself a gangster. My attire consists of 8 shirts, 6 of which are sweaters and two pairs of Dockers, and a pair of khakis. So in other words I am a white guy that likes rap and dresses like a 73 year old man. I used to have more clothes but my thieving landlord took them all! Fuck does he piss me off I am going to stab him next time I see him. Anyways the rapper DMX has released his third album. "And then there was X!" Rap has been decaying a lot lately with less and less solid albums, but DMX is one of the main names and his titles are decent as far as rap goes, but I am going to delve into a single from his new album. [DMX] Hey yo Boo, why do (good girls) like bad guys? Knowin that bad guys tell mad lies? (And why do) dog niggaz (want a honey wit class?) (Sometimes you want more than just a honey wit ass) This is the first verse in the song. Why do Good Girls Like Bad Guys? DMX poses a question to Boo in the first line. Now I am not sure what boo is because I have seen rappers use it in many contexts, so I will assume that the Ebonics council has yet to ratify the true meaning of this word, but we will assume that it is X's homeslice or perhaps some girl. Another thing that amuses me about this verse is how they actually spell out the broken English that they say in the song. This may seem obvious to some but I find it rather amusing. [DMX] Uh, uh Hey yo, who would ever think that the two would go good Midtown honey, nigga from the hood But knock on wood, I got this bitch (what?) excuse me She don't like to be called a bitch, try not to lose me Well X went and stumped us all again with this one. A midtown honey with a nigga from the hood? Now I am no authority on the whereabouts of the place where DMX resides but I am sure it's nowhere near a hood. Everyone knows that kids grow up in projects either play basketball or rap so they can escape and never return to the hood. In fact I am guessing that DMX lives in a better area then his midtown honey. Now apparently she doesn't like being called a bitch, and unless she is actually a dog I don't know of any girls that like being called this, but never the less X pleas with us not to lose him but its too late I have no idea what he is talking about. [DMX] The rules we go by, where I'm from, she don't know When I say I'm goin around the way, she won't go (Hell no) C'mon baby, you aight with me Tryin to get you, to spend the whole night with me (But I'm a good girl) Uhh, that's why I like her Couldn't treat her like a hoodrat, didn't bite her DMX is talking about the rappers right of passage where on a first date with a new girl you force them on a grueling march through the worst streets of their respective project. Of course the midtown girl is too scared to attempt such a journey which is evident from the line "Hell no" X tries to assure her that she is safe and that at the end of the journey his chauffer is waiting to take them to his 1000 room mansion where she should spend the night. Her reply to this offer is "But I'm a good girl" and X says that why he likes her because he is afraid of evil girls. The last line has a lot of symbolism. DMX couldn't treat her as a hoodrat. (At this point I will assume a hoodrat is bigger then a suburban rat). Then he says that he didn't bite her. I think that was a good idea on his part because people don't like to be bit by anything let alone other people. Why he decided to share this gratuitous act with us I don't know but I am assuming that he didn't know what he could make rhyme with "her" in the previous line, and the genius that he is he just used "her" again. [DMX] Turn a church girl to a straight Ruff Ryder Take her to the Ramada make it an all nighter (Oh no, I only go to the Swiss hotel) Fuckin with me? I have you in the back of the Chevelle Like what (what) hittin it raw dogg in the butt You was good this mornin, but tonight you a slut Well X just gets too hard-core for my tastes her. Apparently the opposite of a church girl is a ruff ryder. Now I thought the ruff ryder's were his group of rapper buddies? Apparently he has sex with his group members and the only way to score this midtown girl was to make her a member of the group, which makes sense because the girl sings all the choruses. Now she gets sneaky and says she only stays at the Swiss hotel. I checked this out and it turns out that Switzerland in fact only has one hotel and it's called the Swiss hotel. (If you are Canadian this is similar to the Canada hotel). Now apparently the only way she is going to have sex with X is if he takes her to Switzerland. X will have none of this and asks her if she is fuckin with him? This doesn't make sense because the only way to deal with X is to fuck with him. He then says that he already has her in the back of his Chevelle. This has a two-fold purpose: Apparently X lives in his car and they will have to spend the night sleeping in it, and I don't think he owns a Chevelle, but Jaguar S810zx doesn't rhyme with hotel. The next two lines imply sexuality but if you analyze the second last line I think X is using romantic suave on the Midtown girl. He is comparing their love to have sex with a recently killed and skinned dog. That is one of the strongest sentiments of love found in the hood. Lastly he says that she was good all day but tonight she has to be a slut. X is basically stating that she has to have sex with all his friends too or ask gangstas call it "a bum rush" [DMX] Hey yo Boo, I'm diggin you, cause you make me wanna do all them things I was taught I wasn't supposed to I'm secure, keep it tight while you on tour (You fuckin wit a dog!) That's why I'm feelin you more Attractive to me, wit yo' tactics Hit it like AHHH! Make me backflip (You been tryin to act, rich, that's why I taxed you And I just got married) Hell, but I ain't even ask you (I'm just tellin you, cause nowadays, bitches be flippin) One more bitch, I'm skippin (Damn girl, stop trippin) Cause you be actin like (Listen, I ain't always talkin money But I will keep you wit a smile, and walkin funny So what's it gon' be?) Yo, what you mean? (What to do? You want the nigga wit the slacks, or the jeans and the boots? You wanna be safe or be laced, cause you can be replaced) Yeah, you can be erased (Don't get slapped, babyface) This verse shows the power of X. "Attractive to me, wit yo' tactics" has to be one of the most powerful lines I have ever heard in music since that line "Fill their heads with some slick shit" that he used in his other album. Understanding this line is the key to understanding the song. Other things to take note of in this verse are: - X is finally getting to his girl (She is diggin him) - I believe X is having sex (You wanna make me do all those things I was taught I wasn't supposed to) On second thought maybe she was just contemplating sex. - X works for the IRS (that's why I taxed you) - X is married (And I just got married) - X is honest (I'm just telling you, cause nowadays bitches be flippin) - X is gay (I'm Skippin) - X is violent (Don't get slapped, babyface) [DMX] Man, I got shorty stayin out late (Well I keep him wit a cut and his nails stay clean) At least I get a nut And I got honey rebellin (And I stopped him from sellin) I be gettin away with murder, right? (shit, I ain't tellin) Straight out the hood (yeah, nigga you get mushy) I got honey suckin dick (and I got you eatin pussy) I can be good in a bad way (I can be bad in a good way) Girl, you ain't the same dog (that's what them rats in the hood say or would say, if you was around them more often) I got honey smokin weed (it be havin me coughin) She keep the dog on the leash (when we walk in the streets) And if y'all think it's sweet (then the dog's off the leash Now I don't want no drama, wit no baby's mama I might be a good girl, but I keeps the armor) Girl, you off the hook, but at least now I know why Good girls like bad guys This verse is a banter verse where X and his Midtown girl slug it out. The girl's verses are in brackets if you are real dumb, and basically this is one of the best tales of hood love I have seen in a long time. I hope Spike Lee never gets a hold of this because we will be in for another completely out of touch look at black America. The first line X refers to his girl as Shorty. That is a pet name rappers have for their girls just like when you call your girl honey, or bitch. Now the following points are garnered from the following verse. - Apparently X prior to the relationship had poor hygiene because she made him stay clean especially his nails because he liked to play in the dirt. - X got her rebelling against her parents. (And I got honey rebellin) This means that his girl is probably 13 years old and he has her breaking curfew. Boy is her dad going to be mad. - She got him to stop selling. (And I stopped him from sellin). X is always looking for ways to sell out but she got him to stop selling his autographs on the Ebay. Mainly because he is illiterate and no two signatures are alike, but he apparently got mad and said it is hard to write an X. - They both are performing and receiving Oral sex. - She is getting him to stop hanging around his old friends, which is the first sign that a girl has her man whipped. - She doesn't want to get pregnant so she wears armor, and X lets her off the hook, because he gets an answer to his question of why good girls like bad girls. This song is particularly confusing if you saw the movie Belly. DMX was a hardcore gangsta in the movie, and he used and abused women, but he found Allah and learned that women were to be treated with respect and that the black man had to recover their self-respect and dignity. Apparently this was a message for the youth but X felt no need to adhere to it himself because he put out this album. Fuck is he a hypocrite just like every other rapper that speaks out against violence and then raps about drive bys. In closing I ask that they stop making rap albums because I am sick of rich white teenagers acting like they are living in a gangster's paradise and pissing me off. In fact everyone I have to spark with my nine. I picture its DMX and I laugh, although sometimes I picture my landlord. On that note I am going to key his car. See yall l8tr foo. -*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+-*-+- -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Issue #11 February 23rd, 2000